Hey Little Sister By Henry J. Cobb

[The Haruhi Suzumiya characters are the creation of Nagaru Tanigawa, etc. No infringement of their rights is intended. Also this is post novel eleven so stop reading now.]

So I was going to get Haruhi an anniversary present. It was going to happen, because I had already seen it happen. It wasn't so much a question of obligation, as a matter of keeping the timelines straight. It wasn't a gift for her, but a gift for myself. Something to settle my own peace of mind.

The only problem was that I was drawing a blank. What do you get the girl who was God, but could never know it? Perhaps if I asked one of her friends?

She does not have a friend in the world.

No, wait. That can't be right. Okay sure, myself and the other members of her brigade have been obligated to associate with her, but I think we've grown closer in the past year. So let's put the brigade to the side then.

Who is it in our classroom who's ever even taken an interest in Haruhi's health? Only Miss Asakura, and even that was not just her job as class representative, but also her hidden agenda from her secret masters.

The only person I could think of who had ever voluntarily associated with the troublesome Miss Suzumiya, without any obligation on their part or shallow dating ambitions, was myself. And that was before the obligation of changing her diapers was thrust on me by the other brigade members.

So like the strongman leader of some third world nation, was it only those who feared what she might do, who did what she said?

Desperately I searched back over my memories of the past year. Was there truly nobody? And then it hit me. There was one person in all the world, who had sought out Haruhi without knowing the secrets, without being ordered into it, or bullied into by Haruhi. That one strange bizarre person. "There is another Skywalker!"

I found the object of my search in our living room, watching TV. I sat down and watched her.

When the commercials started she hit the mute button and turned to me. "Yes, Kyon?"

"What do you see in Haruhi?"

"I like her a lot. She's a lot like me."

The cold hand of death itself settled on my heart. That sick bastard from the future had been wrong all along. The alternative candidate for goddess wasn't Miss Sasaki after all. I sat back in shock and tried to think of some way to spare my little sister from the fate before her.

"I've seen that look before, Kyon. Haruhi's coming over here, right?"

I dared to breathe and then answered her. "No, but there's something I need to do for Haruhi. Can you help me?"


"Can you keep a secret?"


"We're going to go buy her a present."


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