The Uneventful life of Haruhi Suzumiya By Henry J. Cobb

[The Haruhi Suzumiya characters are the creation of Nagaru Tanigawa, etc. No infringment of their rights is intended.]

Yuki Nagato, Mikuru Asahina, Itsuki Koizumi: In the end none of them had proven their fantastical claims about Haruhi Suzumiya. They had all just drifted away after Haruhi started spending almost all her time with me.

We just didn't have time for the SOS Brigade or any other clubs. Most afternoons Haruhi would come over to my house after school and help with my homework or play with my sister, who had taken to calling her aunt-Haruhi. Sister-Haruhi would have course been the correct term, but that was for later. We hadn't gone shopping for rings yet, but the unspoken promise was that it would be the very first thing after college graduation.

Our parents were overjoyed that we both had finally found a normal relationship. There was no pressure at all from either side. It didn't hurt that my grades had improved with the daily tutoring. Sometimes we went out for double dates with Taniguchi and Asakura.

We hadn't intended to participate in any of the events for the cultural festival, but Haruhi and Yuki had subsituted in for a rock band at the last moment. We had been visiting Yuki's booth and Haruhi was blushing because Yuki had just predicted that we'd have three children, when a member of the band showed up to beg Haruhi's help. Haruhi had played her heart out and had now collasped on top of me, under the shade of a tree in the school courtyard.

As I fanned us both with an event program, I looked down on Haruhi's peaceful sleeping face. It was a moment I wouldn't trade for all the money, power and fame in the world. If the Chinese were correct that one of the greatest curses was that one should live in interesting times, then I considered myself to be very blessed indeed.

I fell out of my bed as the buzzing of my cellphone woke me up. I fumbled for it then finally got it open, "Haruhi, it's eleven p.m.?"

"And the rest of the brigade is already at the haunted house that we will be checking for extraterrestrials. You need to get here right now or I will hunt you down and skin you alive with a blunt spork! Don't keep me waiting Kyon."


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